Thursday, February 18, 2010

Random Earth Man and Algol Foodstuffs Tables

Random Earth Men d20
01- Naive British schoolchildren.
02- Ruthless military officer, secretly paranoid and xenophobic, may snap under pressure.
03- Homeless French-Canadian punk rocker (25% chance of dog, 50% chance of it being a pitbull) will be oblivious to the change in scenery and will be looking for "ze beer store."
04- Unflappable Victorian-era explorer.
05- Clueless reporter that believes he will get home soon with a "great story."
06- Old West prospector with amazing mule (1-3), dog (4-5) or bear (6).
07- Mongol warrior that is having a great time.
08- Very religious medieval knight that believes that he is in hell and that everyone are demons, constantly lamenting.
09- Science fiction author that is disgusted with being a genre cliche.
10- Criminal mastermind that lands on his feet and immediately beings laying the foundations of a new criminal empire.
11- Native American warrior, total badass that can make bows and canoes and the like.
12- All-American sports hero with a punchy nickname.
13- Brilliant engineer that can MacGuyver shit.
14- Child detective almost always right but has 50% chance of being insufferably smug.
15- African-American martial artists, 50% chance of being a stone fox.
16- Renaissance-era Renaissance man, 60% chance of being always condescending and 75% chance of being a fencing master.
17- Super hero cast to Algol by super villain.
18- Saucer Nazis!
19- Protagonist of a fish-out-of-water comedy, immune to serious harm but is always casuing convoluted complicated situations.
20- Exasperated cop, either action hero of dad-type that was about to retire.

Random Algol Foodstuffs d24
01- Algae wafers.
02- Preserved fungus.
03- Yeast cake.
04- Died grubs.
05- Live grubs.
06- Delicious effervescent nectar.
07- Lumpy gray paste.
08- Giant slug (or other oversize invertebrate) flesh.
09- Mucous soup.
10- Dinosaur meat in oversize cuts.
11- Large gelatinous invertebrate eggs.
12- Large reptile or avian eggs.
13- Entire amphibian.
14- Albino carp.
15- Metallic fruit.
16- Live culture.
17- Sausage containing wildly varying ingredients.
18- Composite of yeast, algae, dried grubs, etc.
19- Tubers.
20- Small cubes or spheres of intensely concentrated nutrition.
21- Giant arthropod limbs.
22- Entire dried reptile.
23- Dried primate.
24- Incredibly spicy, reroll.


  1. I love the Random Earth Men table. :D

  2. > 01- Naive British schoolchildren.

    Awww yeah, Washington Washington!

  3. When do we get all this stuff available as to buy. I'm not sure that there has ever been a setting more pure in it's gonzo awesomeness.

  4. 01- Naive British schoolchildren.

    4, 5, or 7 of them?

  5. 20- Exasperated cop, either action hero of dad-type that was about to retire.

    Mel Gibson on Mars?! :)

  6. I just woke up and for a moment I thought that Naive British schoolchildren were a common Algol food.

  7. "Just two days from retirement and here I am pinned down in a broken crystal tower by yellow cannibal freaks, with my last clip in my pistol, I just knew I should have stayed away from the glowing light in that alley."
    -Exasperated Cop

  8. I thought the same thing as Jeff. And by God, if I ever use the food chart, I'm adding British schoolchildren.

  9. "I just woke up and for a moment I thought that Naive British schoolchildren were a common Algol food."

    I've been awake for since 1am last night... and I thought the exact same thing! :D

  10. Ahem... "23- Dried primate."

    Interpret that as you will...

  11. I love me a table that features Saucer Nazis!

  12. A live culture of metallic fruit? Pretty cool.