Friday, November 11, 2011

Fortress Eibon Rumor Mill

Talk heard around the camel-kebab and fermented-goat's milk vendors in the itinerant camp outside of the walls of Yam.

From a mercenary equipped with plate mail and a spear:

"We found a hole in the murder floor above the western main gate entrance tunnel. The little man-child Columbo threw a rock tied to a rope through the grating of the murder floor and bravely ascended and scouted ahead by himself. We found a room full of decayed furniture and foodstores and three white devil-hounds with blazing blues eyes like that of a sabre-toothed tiger killed three of my mercenary brothers and crushed the windpipes of three of the adventurers: the old sorcerer, the dwarf-slave with the girl-like face, and Gagner the fighter. It took many many blows but we slew the demon beasts. Two of the adventurers were living but comatose after the battle, but the feminine dwarf-slave's throat had been torn out! Although the sorcerer and fighting-man recovered, Gagner was so unmanned by his battle-wound that he left their party!"

A week later from another mercenary in new plate mail with a polearm:

"We climbed a rope up into the murder floor above the western gate tunnel. We found the scene of a bloody slaughter with the scattered and gnawed remains of huge white devil-hounds and fighting-men. The delver's gathered several measures of silver from the unclean beasts feces-strewn lair. We encountered some eagle-sized moths that flew at the delver's glowing swords. The cleric was lighting a torch to burn the moths; they all flew at it, became engulfed in flames and began flying at us while dripping burning oil. The graybeard wizard, girl-child and the cleric ran away but the pygmy and loud one and my brothers but them down. We found some hashish and opium worth 600 gold coins, the loud one kept trying to attempt a deceit and keep the intoxicants for himself but we were like iron-jawed wolves my friend and did not let these itinerant tomb-robbers take our share of the bounty.

We went down a long tunnel and came upon a swarm of child-sized fleas. The old man used a sorcery to render them all asleep and they were crushed. We were flanked by a band of unclean shriveled grabbing man-things but they were cut down.

We ascended a stair and came upon a hideous slime slug-thing that attacked our heads and made some of us attack each other while others babbled and defecated like animals. The cowardly old warlock attacked it with a stick and beat it soundly before the loud one, who had been cowering using some invisibility charm, cut it down.

We found some treasure and decided to return to Yam. Reflecting upon our lucartive yet risky venture one fact was distinct in the minds of all us mercenary brothers. The loud one had tried to get us to open chests for him and set off traps in his stead. He was like an oily weasel-snake that hisses loudly and schemes to take all for himself and I would not work for his gold ever again my friend!

On our way back to the exit the little pygmy warrior found a purse of gold coins that ate part of his hand before it was sent back to the hells of greed."


  1. "by this point all four of my mercenary brothers had died."

    whoa whoa I swear that none of he mercenaries died on our second expedition, this guy doesn't know what he's talking about