[PSA] Please Don't Nuke Your Blog! & d10 Romantic Misadventures Table

Fellow-Blogger and/or Internet-Acquaintance,

I've been reading your blog for a while, and recently when I clicked my bookmark for it and I recieved the blogspot 404 orange-beige-and-blue staring me right in the eyes. Needless to say I was confused; did I click the wrong bookmark? Did China hack blogspot? Oh wait... I've seen this before... Far too many times...

Hey, I get it, blogging is kind of a geeky, masturbatory time-suck. And BlasTeR_WvlF1986 has been really grinding and sniping at you on both the BullseyeLantern and the ZagygTemple messageboards. But, aside from the fact that I liked reading your blog, there's this one thing...

That Shoggoth Generation table; it was a piece of art! I could get everything from a member of the Cleanup Crew to a Mr. Shiny to a Blob-Kaiju using it. I really need that Shoggoth Generation table for this dungeon level I'm working on...I made the map with your table in mind!

Plus there's also that Uppity NPC Table, and Random Minor PC Humiliations Matrix, and your stats for The Headless Horseman, and that Bowels of the Worm God dungeon, and...

...Anyways, if you want to take a sabbatical or retire from blogging, that's certainly your prerogative, but please don't euthanize all of that useful content you produced! I'm sure you could easily erase the fingerprints and serial numbers off of your blog and leave the corpse floating in the internet for us scavengers to pick at. Your so graciously freely-shared creative output was appreciated, greatly appreciated!

EDIT: Joe-Sky Tax,

d10 Random "Romantic" Misadventures Table
1 - Birthmark reveals that she/he is your sister/brother!
2 - You're unable to perform and cruelly mocked for that by paramour.
3 - Premature. Way too premature. As above.
4 - Overprotective relative bursts in, menacing wackiness ensues!
5 - Everything seems fine...for 1d20 days. Better see a physician to irrigate your urethra with sulphur and quicksilver!
6 - Oh wait, afterwards it appears that she/he was expecting financial recompense for making the beast with two backs with you,
7 - She/he seemed normal, but now wants something illegal before they will "party."
8 - Turns out she/he was a serial killer (or bounty hunter)... d12 for assassin level!
9 - She/he was the princess/prince in disguise; not a fairy-tale, the consequences if the wrong party learns of this could be potentially lethal.
10 - Was a virgin; 01-50% - it is Really Really Awkward, and they seem distraught afterwards, 51-00% unleashes some inconvenient or catastrophic curse, transformation or prophecy...she/he was THE ONE!

[Category - Bloody Obvious Ideas] Artwork First Monster Manual?

I know there's been a lot of OSR-blogosphere discussion about greater collaboration between writers and artists blah blah blah... (I'm going to be a dick and NOT LINK to said discussions).

Whilst meditating on said subject the idea struck me, "It would be awesome if a bunch of awesome OSR-ish artists types assembled a collection of bitchin' original monster illustrations, and than said monsters were statted out for a monster book (including morale scores and hoard classes dammit! And also Comprehensive Encounter Tables too!)"

The next idea to strike me was "Duuh genius...I'm sure someone has already done that." Although I'm sure it was more like 20 monsters for 3E in a $12 PDF-only product, and done in that full-color, overblown DevaintArt style...

Anyways, a nice thick monster manual of OSR illustrator monsters could be pretty freaking awesome, and I'm pretty much counting on James Mal. to get on this right on this after releasing Petty Gods...

Stefan Poag - Pure Class!

I've made no secret of my admiration for Stefan Poag; I love his lurid artwork; I love Mines of Khunmar; I love his unabashed enthusiasm for gruesome, perverse and scatological subject matter; I love how he's kind of a dick (with a heart of gold) on his blog; I love Exquisite Corpses.

Anyways, when he first released Exquisite Corpses I immediately snagged the (temporarily) free PDF; my gaming group had a hardcopy as well. I had always meant to buy the print version, but like a chump there was always something else sucking up my $$.

Today I finally manned-up and bought a print copy from Lulu; afterwards I found the following message in my inbox:

"Thank you for your order. Your support is appreciated.
regards
stef"

Sure it's an automated message, but it's appreciated and is a testament to Stefan's character.

This beer and this bong rip are a toast to Stefan Poag, one of the finest gentlemen of the OSR!

Awesome Sci-Fi OD&D Supplement - Terminal Space!

The Polish gentleman necro_cyber dropped me a line to let me know that his science fiction/science fantasy supplement for OD&D, Terminal Space, was available for download (the sidebar-widget pdf thing on the right-hand side).

Just a quick first-impression review. It unabashedly proclaims itself a "...supplement for Dungeons & Dragon Original Edition."; it contains lots of genuinely cool/good original art (Spaceman vs. Beholders!); it was originally in Polish, the translation is charmingly clunky but completely clear; it has a d% Deep Space Encounter Table!; solar system, Moon! and planet generation tables; spacecraft rules; pilot, technician and scientist character class; tables for the pilot%, repair% and science% skills for OD&D classes!; a tech level Ability Score!; and a bunch of other wacky, sci-fi OD&D goodness.

I will definitely be printing this out in digest-format and using it in my campaign, and I strongly recommend this to those of like (weird/sci-fi/sci-fantasy) interests!

My Players Curse the Name "JRients..."/One Man's Stupid is the Other's Highbrow

During last Sunday's Planet Algol game the players decided upon a bit of petty larceny, plotting to break into the Tower of the Twin Sky Masters (twin silver men with pterosaur mounts who report vulnerable travellers to a band of slavers).

Of course the tower was guarded, by a guardian beast....The Saw Bear.

The party was invisible and foolishly tried to maintain their invisibility by not attacking the buzz-saw armed armored bear while running around the tower trying to loot it. This is where rule 0 comes in play. "You may be invisible, but if the room was completely dark a bear would be able to find you, especially as you're wearing armor and bleeding."

The players could have used slowing magic on the bear and than kept their distance while blasting it with their firearms, lasers and calcium bombs. But no, it was like the invisible stooges trying to loot the tower while dodging a furious saw-bear. Trying to carry a heavy metal chest away while a saw-bear is attacking their invisible ass and the like.

Five characters died before the saw-bear was slain...and yes, indeed two of the players were cursing J Rients!

Now one's initial reaction may be "An armored bear with circular-saws for forepaws? What kind of stupid shit is this? Seriously guy, are you trying to make a joke of D&D with your saw-bears and crap? I thought this was a serious campaign setting, not some Encounter Critical-esque joke!"

Actually, there's a precedent for this kind of madness in one the literary influences upon Planet Algol. One man's "stupid gonzo shit" is another's "commentary upon mankinds oftentimes abusive relationship with animals."

Credit Where Credit Is Due, Other Neglected Notes and Further Zigguratitude

1. A while ago I posted my "100 NPC(s) Table." I feel terrible for neglecting to mention/credit how much of an inspiration Zak Smith's "Hidden Traits of NPCs" tables was. #99 is my favorite!

2. After I posted about my appreciation for Morten Braten's Ancient Kingdoms: Mesoptomia, the admirable Melan put a boot up my ass for neglecting to mention XP1: The Spider God's Bride And Other Tales, an excellent 3.5 edition traditional Sword & Sorcery resource and non-sucky adventure path easily usable with any version/edition.

3. While I was discussing Mesopotamian D&D, I should have also mentioned Chgowiz' yet unreleased "Land of Two Rivers/Tomb of Hulkursag." The crumbs of info I have seen have me drooling...

4. One day I berate simulacrum producers and the OSR-at-large for neglecting the Froghemoth and the next day a true scholar and gentleman of the aforementioned OSR provides an open game content version for us all to use.

5. More Black Ziggurat sightings: The Mutant Future and a partial cross-section of Ziqquratu Ziyaret.

6. I make a post about unique spellbooks and than one of you wise-acres has to go and beat me to making a Random Magic Book Name Generator. Also Trollsmyth went and provided links to further examples of such books.

Hopefully my next post will actually have some Planet Algol related content instead of blogosphere/meta- echo chambering (as much I love the "echo chamber" effect!).

Further Sightings of the Black Ziggurat!

Under the Dying Sun (and a very meta- manifestation as well!)
The Ebon Zikkuract (a very literal tesseract manifestation and now we have the word "zikkuract!")
The Black Ziggurat of Riskail (You know Riskail? That hot, new weird fantasy setting with all the talented writing and artwork...plus their Black Ziggurat has a Shoggoth!)
And what's This? Only the Black Ziggurat of GREYHAWK! (Which also contains an imprisoned Satan-figure and a lightsabre...)
EDIT: I'm hating myself for forgetting The Black Ziggurat of the Mutant Future!