Wednesday, December 21, 2011

[Rient-sian]The Man From Y.E.T.I.

This pretty much sounds like the best TV Show ever, as well as a kick-ass gonzo dungeon setting:
"The Man From Y.E.T.I. was a 17-episode U.S. television show, originally airing September 1968 to February 1969. Often compared to The Prisoner, the show combined unexplained surreal situations and characters, paranoia, science-fiction, and action-adventure...

...Opening Sequence

The opening sequence of The Man From Y.E.T.I. featured extended shots of Faraday running down vast hallways and leaping over obstacles, as well as struggling to free himself from a variety of traps. More than half of the footage used in the opening never appeared in the actual show: a car chase through a city, Faraday firing a gun point-blank at a man in a lab coat who explodes, and Faraday commandeering a helicopter, among many other scenes. At one point the camera cuts to a stack of papers with "RICK ROBERTSON" printed on the topmost page; a hand wearing a golden ring brings down a stamp, marking the page with "CONTAIN" in red ink. No character named Rick Robertson appears in the show, leading some to presume that this is the name of the actor who plays Faraday, but the total lack of beginning or ending credits on the show makes it impossible to know for sure. The footage was accompanied by the show's memorable theme song, which primarily featured drums and flute, with a low growl building through much of it, climaxing in a euphoric roar as the song reaches full-swing.

Plot

The series follows a man, unnamed for much of the show but later identified as Faraday, as he explores an underground prison complex in which he is held. Every episode, he must complete a task or variety of tasks given to him by his captors, or face death.
Most episodes would begin with Faraday cautiously exploring a new area of the prison and nearly injuring himself in the process. Often, a dog would emerge from out of view and begin speaking to Faraday in a robotic voice. The scene would then show a robot in a different location, controlling the dog's mind and speaking through it. The dog would give Faraday an unexplained task ("Defeat the Minotaur and reach the Heart of Wood," "Fill the Bottle," "Build an Airplane Engine") and then threaten him with various grisly deaths should he fail.
Sometimes the task would turn out to be allegorical, but other times they must be literally completed (Faraday must actually construct an airplane engine or be dissolved in acid in one episode).
In addition to these tasks, Faraday constantly seeks a way to escape from the complex, often hatching elaborate plots to take advantage of new possible exits. Faraday will often make a fair amount of progress on a plan in a given episode, before a number of seemingly coincidental single events interlock to cause the ruin of his scheme.
As the series goes on, Faraday is exposed to a hallucinogenic gas with increasing frequency. While under the effects of the drug, he encounters a race of alligator-men who appear to be running the complex and preventing his escape. Although Faraday seems to catch glimpses of the alligator-men when not drugged, it is unclear whether they actually exist.
Another recurring event is the donning of a markedly low-quality parka or ghillie suit, which Faraday always finds in a sealed capsule mysteriously placed for him to find it, just before the climactic action sequence of an episode. This occurs nearly every episode, and neither the parka, the capsules, or the reason for wearing it are ever explained. Episodes typically end with Faraday still wearing the bizarre garment, but he never has it at the beginning of the following episode.
In a number of the episodes, Faraday encounters red service telephones. Occasionally they blink, and Faraday, shocked, runs to answer them, only to be confronted with weird, unintelligible noises. After Episode 8: "Mysteries of the Monmouth Codex, Part 2," Faraday no long attempts to answer the phones but instead goes out of his way to destroy them when they light up...

...Episode 5: "The Silent Caucus"

"In order to solve an unexplained dispute between two opposing factions of masked antagonists, Faraday must assemble an airplane engine or be dissolved in acid."
Th episode opens on a still overhead shot of a room in the complex. Faraday enters from the left, walking slowly, and comes to a stop in the center of the frame. A garbled voice is heard, presumably from off-screen, and Faraday exclaims, "not with my trusty pocket knife, you won't!" as he pulls a switchblade from his pocket. A spear flies into the frame from the right, seemingly striking Faraday, who cries out and falls off screen. The opening sequence then plays as normal.
Once the opening sequence ends, the episode cuts to Faraday, now underwater with a large Bowie knife in his mouth, swimming in what seems an underwater cave, tense music playing. After a few seconds, he comes to a large hole that appears blasted in the rock wall and swims through. He emerges in a cavern and climbs out of the water (which is clearly an above-ground pool poorly painted to look like stone). As Faraday stalks away (inexplicably holding a flashlight), the camera zooms on the pool, which bubbles ominously.
While creeping through the caverns, Faraday comes across a mysterious glyph carved on the rock wall. While studying it intently, the camera pulls back to show a mole-man slowly lumbering behind him. After an extremely prolonged shot of the mole-man's approach, it finally attacks Faraday. A lengthy battle ensues, finally ending when Faraday bludgeons the mole-man with a rock.
Faraday then comes to a narrow ledge, presumably over a chasm. With great trepidation, he creeps along the edge, his back to the wall. He makes it halfway across before tripping over his own feet. Faraday lets out a long, piercing scream, which continues for several seconds after he very clearly falls on a mat that is not entirely off screen. The camera cuts to show Faraday landing on a table about which are seated three men in strange outfits. The men are wearing red jump suits and red helmets with mirrored, featureless facemasks. On top of the helmets, they are wearing white 18th-century judge wigs, and the man in the center has gold epaulettes and other finery. The three men leap up, and similarly-dressed guards without wigs rush in and grab Faraday. The camera jump cuts to Faraday in a witness box, the three wigged men sitting in the judge's position in a full courtroom built in the cavern. Many other masked men fill the room, sitting in bleachers, and one paces back and forth in front of Faraday.
What follows is an extended scene wherein Faraday is presumably questioned by the man in front of him, but none of the masked men speak. Through the masked men's hand gestures, sound effects, and Faraday's responses, it is implied that the masked men are using telepathy to communicate. The prosecutor gestures emphatically, presents documents, and generally badgers Faraday, who replies frustradely with phrases such as, "Why, I've never even heard of Perturbinium," "the giant's coin never spoke," and, finally, with great intensity and accompanied by a musical sting, "I already told you: HE. WASN'T. EGYPTIAN."
The camera then cuts several times between Faraday's stern face and the judges apparently deliberating, the audience animatedly conversing telepathically. Finally the head judge slams his fists on the table and the room shakes; he points one finger at Faraday. The camera slowly zooms on the pointing judge, then cuts to Faraday being manhandled down stone stairs by two masked men. Faraday exclaims, presumably to the men: "...an AIRPLANE ENGINE?" and "What? Or else what?!" They shove him into a room with a large table, covered in mechanical parts. As Faraday looks around, he sees a pool in one corner, full of bubbling acid. He gulps nervously to himself and then squares his shoulders and walks to the table. A montage of Faraday assembling the engine ensues, interspersed with him looking at the acid pit and gulping nervously. Halfway through the montage, the music abruptly changes mid-song, from tense and ominous to an up-beat pop-rock instrumental. The montage ends, and Faraday, looking pleased with himself, has one final screw to put in place. Just as he's about to fit the screw in, the hallucinogenic gas pours out of the screw hole and Faraday loses consciousness.
In the gas montage, Faraday is crawling through what seems to be a sewer, where he comes across a large open chamber in which a group of robed alligator-men are practicing some sort of ceremony. Faraday watches with horror as the ghastly ritual proceeds, then suddenly trips and falls into the chamber. Just as he hits the ground, the camera cuts to Faraday sitting in a circus. The crowd is entirely in the dark and only Faraday can be seen. The camera cuts between tight shots of Faraday's confused and worried face and various circus animals, whose cries have been dubbed over with the sound of a speeding car. The montage then cuts to Faraday in a dusty lab, packed with equipment. He wears a lab coat and black rubber gloves, and laughs maniacally as he connects two power cables. Electricity courses through the cables and the lights flash, and a large robot sits up behind Faraday.
Faraday regains consciousness in the cockpit of a one-seat airplane. He cries out, "going... to crash! Got to... pull up!" He flails around for a short time, then reaches under his seat to find a silver parka capsule. The action theme swells, as a lengthy suiting-up scene plays out. After a number of minutes, Faraday finally grabs the controls. The camera immediately cuts to a shot of the aircraft crashing directly into the ground, exploding in a massive fireball. It then cuts back to Faraday, who lowers his hands from eyes and realizes he's still alive; the window of the plane is displaying television static. Confused, he opens the door and emerges (mysteriously without the action parka), to see that he's actually in a crude flight simulator. He soon makes up his mind to leave and cautiously sneaks down a number of corridors. Eventually he pauses and remarks, "feels like I'm being watched... but from where?" As he leaves, the camera pulls back to reveal one of the masked men watching him from behind a previous corner. The music builds as the masked man checks his weapon, and as the score reaches a crescendo, he removes his helmet to reveal Faraday's face underneath.

Episode 6: "Seek Not To Undo What Has Been Begun"

The episode opens with a gang of men in yellow jump suits at the intersection of two long corridors. A brief but heated argument is already begun, and the men quickly decide to split up and run down the hallways. Once the men are gone, Faraday and a woman wearing a knit brown cape with a twig embroidered on it (Deidre Hall, in an uncredited appearance) emerge from a very poorly concealed secret door in the wall. Faraday and the woman cautiously advance down several corridors before they come into a circular chamber with a pool in the center. Near the entrance, two of the men in yellow jumpsuits are standing guard. Faraday and the woman, whom he refers to as Cindy, sneak up on the guards and knock them out in order to steal their jump suits for use as disguises. It is implied that the pool was an underwater dock, as in the next scene Faraday is piloting a submarine with Cindy at the SONAR screen. Despite the previous scene showing both Faraday and Cindy putting the jump suits on, only Faraday is wearing one; at no point in the episode does Cindy have one. Faraday explains to Cindy that they can escape the complex through the Sea of Valusia; this scene features extraordinarily low-quality dubbing, with the line heard not matching Faraday's lip movements at all. Cindy points behind Faraday and asks, "what's that?" Faraday turns and exclaims the classic line, "a Deleuzian Randorph-Retsobrenner Synchro-Phasic Fusilizer!" He picks up a shoddy-looking ray gun and inspects it, proclaiming, "only three Nebulon batteries. Better be careful." Suddenly the cabin of the submarine shakes wildly and Cindy studies the SONAR, realizing that they're under attack by a Geo-Killer (note that no such monster is ever shown). The cabin's window cracks and Cindy and Faraday exchange Significant Looks, only to be horrified when instead of water, the hallucinogenic gas pours into the sub from the destroyed viewport. After blacking out, Faraday experiences a montage of scenes featuring the alligator-men, including them wiring a car battery up to 10-foot-tall robotic version of his own head, which begins speaking badly-mangled Portuguese. Upon waking, Faraday finds himself inside at the bottom of a large circular cement pit with no visible exits. With a shock, he sees Cindy's unconscious form on the other side of the chamber (despite no trace of her being there in the pan around the room a moment before), a deadly Ghost Snake wrapped around her. The familiar action theme picks up and Faraday sees a capsule, dons his parka and proceeds to violently clash with the Ghost Snake, barely defeating it after several minutes of struggle. He finds that Cindy is alive, but will quickly die from the bite of the Ghost Snake. Thinking quickly, Faraday pulls a Nebulon battery from the Deleuzian Randorph-Retsobrenner Synchro-Phasic Fusilizer and smashes it on the floor. Foaming, bright green liquid starts pouring out and he holds it to Cindy's lips, explaining, "quick, drink this!" Cindy quickly recovers fully and the two start down a hallway, as they are inexplicably in a different room with clear exits once she wakes. All seems well, until Cindy screams, and Faraday watches in horror as she rapidly transforms into a werewolf.
Were-Cindy growls viciously and leaps to attack Faraday, but he dodges just in time and she leaps past him. Before he can do anything, Cindy mounts a dirtbike that is suddenly in the room and rides down a long corridor, Faraday futilely trying to catch up with her until the image freezes on his defeated form and the credits roll.

Episode 7: "Mysteries of the Monmouth Codex, Part 1"

The episode opens with a tight shot of a bright red emergency telephone, slowly panning out to reveal one of the long corridors typical of the facility, with Faraday just coming into view around a corner at the opposite end. Upon sighting the phone, he dashes over and rips the receiver off the hook, tapping frantically at the single button in an attempt to get an outside line. After shouting for a response, he resigns his efforts, drops the phone and exits the corridor, apparently through the same door through which he had entered.
In the following scenes, Faraday follows a narrowing passage into an enormous, circular room, with a steaming, poorly-constructed silver rocket staged in the middle. The camera cuts to a view of Faraday from behind and pans up with his gaze, revealing that the rocket is emblazoned with a large hammer-and-sickle emblem and the C.C.C.P. insignia; he also notes aloud that there are no silo doors in the ceiling. Upon approaching the rocket for a closer inspection, Faraday catches sight of a capsule, and proceeds to don the parka it contains. No sooner has he done this than he is attacked from behind by an ape-creature in a badly-torn metallic silver spacesuit, which catches him in a bear-hug. As the action theme swells, Faraday grapples with the ape dramatically until he is overpowered and thrown through a conveniently-placed stack of cylindrical barrels. When he regains his footing, he has somehow produced the Fusilizer from Episode 6, which he then trains on the approaching ape. Faraday attempts to fire, but the weapon explodes in his hand (leading to his oft-quoted exclamation, "Blast! A Nebulon overcharge!") and the ape, now holding what appears to be a Fusilizer of its own, uses the device to spray him with a hefty dose of the hallucinogenic gas.
The ensuing montage includes depictions of the alligator-men wearing construction helmets and repairing telephone wires in a field, stocking a large shelf with Faraday dolls and worshiping a giant, golden statue of a human ear. Upon regaining consciousness, Faraday finds himself in what he initially believes to be his childhood bedroom, but he quickly discovers it to be a crude reproduction. After finding an exit he continues on through a series of rooms, among them an empty laboratory full of bubbling orange beakers, until he emerges back into another corridor with a red telephone (this corridor is identical to the one in the opening scene, though it's never explicitly stated that they are, in fact, one and the same). Suddenly, the small light on the phone stars blinking, and it emits a bizarre series of buzzing noises. Faraday approaches cautiously and answers; he is told to "Seek the Abramelin Sign" by a strange mechanical voice, after which the line goes dead.
Throughout the rest of the episode, Faraday is seen navigating a series of corridors and empty hangars, during which he chases a robotic key to unlock an oversized vault door and ultimately has to jump over a pit teeming with scorpions (a task which he bemoans at great length). At one point, he enters a factory assembly line producing heavy machine components. He sights a lone worker in a yellow hazmat containment suit that appears to have a tail. A chase ensues, but Faraday is ambushed by a team of Red Ninja assassins, who he fends off during a lengthy fight sequence. Resuming the chase, he turns a corner to find himself at a dead end, in a short hallway with another phone on the opposite wall.
In the final scene Faraday, looking somewhat bewildered, examines the phone and finds that it, unlike others he has encountered in the facility, has a coin-intake slot. A small placard on the wall next to it reads "INSERT TOKEN - WAIT FOR OUTSIDE LINE" (some die-hard fans have postulated that this is, in fact, the "Abramelin Sign" mentioned earlier in the episode, though artifacts in the script throw this theory into question). The camera cuts back to Faraday; a look of frustrated determination spreads over his face, and the words TO BE CONTINUED appear below him in bold, orange letters.

Episode 8: "Mysteries of the Monmouth Codex, Part 2"

In the second half of the two-part episode, the familiar opening sequence is replaced with the world "PREVIOUSLY" in a bold, orange font over a dark green background, followed by a brief recap in the form of a montage; several scenes depicted did not actually occur in the previous episode (one notable exception having not appeared in the show at all). After the theme song ends, the camera fades in on Faraday suspended upside-down by a chain above a large smoking vat labelled LIQUID NITROGEN, struggling to free himself. Before long, he produces his trusty pocketknife. As he pulls himself up, the camera cuts to a close-up shot of a rope tied around his feet, which he laboriously hacks through with the knife. Once done, the camera cuts to Faraday leaning against the vat, looking relieved; the chain is still visible above him in the background.
Now free, Faraday gathers his wits and regains his breath. He fishes a chrome cigarette case from his breast pocket. He then produces a matchbook, seemingly from nowhere. When he strikes the match, the matchbook explodes with hallucinogenic gas, and Faraday rapidly loses consciousness.
The screen distorts with the gas effects and the camera fades in, low to the ground with a fish-eye lens, on a room littered with Red Ninja bodies. Smoke fills the air, unexplained, and a light flickers on and off. Shrill, discordant, vaguely Asian-themed music and the groans of the dying supplement the sound effects. One Red Ninja remains, a diagonal slash across his chest, implying that he is the sole survivor of the battle in "Mysteries of the Monmouth Codex Part 1". The Ninja removes his mask and it is Faraday; the camera circles around him as he raises his fist and screams (with no sound), vengeance consuming him. Suddenly, the hallucination cuts to an alligator-man walking down a hallway. As it rounds a corner, the alligator-man raises its gun and the bark of a large dog is dubbed over its mouth movements. The camera cuts to a view of Faraday from behind. In one deft movement, he spins around and instantly blasts the alligator-man with the Fusilizer he holds, all in less than a second. The camera then shows the dead alligator-man from Faraday's point of view. As the shot tilts down he examines his own hands; one is now a pirate's hook and the other is the hand of a large black man, covered in jewelry. The camera tilts back up, the hands leave the frame, and Faraday now stands in front of a table. Out of the hallucinogenic haze, he steps to the table and lifts up a coin; a fast zoom reveals that it says PHONE TOKEN. Faraday, determined, wheels about and walks through a door. Footage of him entering the corridor with the phone from "Mysteries of the Monmouth Codex Part 1" is played, and Faraday, dubbed, gasps "Got to... call... for help..!" The camera cuts to Faraday, clearly in a different room, tripping over his own feet with a loud grunt. He drops the token, which immediately begins to roll down the long corridor. Faraday, mortified, shouts "NO!" and leaps to his feet.
What follows is an incredibly long sequence of Faraday attempting to catch up to the quarter. Faraday chases the rolling coin for over 10 minutes, through hallways, rooms filled with computers, and countless other environs. Finally, he chases it into a room packed with tables and machinery. He gets closer and closer to the token, nearly within range; he jumps for it, and mere millimeters from his fingers, it drops into an open grate in the floor and disappears. Rage consumes Faraday, and for more than five minutes straight he destroys all of the contents of the room; he smashes computers, destroys furniture and machines with a large wrench, and more; he does not stop screaming for the entire length of the scene. After individually picking up and dashing on the ground every item on a large wooden table, he grabs the edges of the table and flips it with all of his might. The table is shown flipping in slow-motion from multiple camera angles, each time with all of the previously-smashed items back on it.
As soon as the table is flipped, a mind-control robot rounds a corner, its arms flailing as much as its limited range of motion will allow. The footage of Faraday wheeling around and firing the Fusilizer from earlier in the episode is reused; the robot explodes into a loose pile of sheet metal and copper wiring. Faraday reaches into this pile of debris and removes a large washer. He gazes at it in deep thought, nodding to himself, and the camera fades to black. It fades back in on the same shot of Faraday, now surrounded by metal shavings. In one hand he holds his pocket knife (clearly a different model and color of knife than the one seen earlier) and in the other is a U.S. Quarter. Faraday nods to himself, satisfied, and sets off, remarking, "now, to find that phone...!"
Faraday rounds a corner at exactly the same time as a Red Ninja, presumably the one Faraday experienced in his vision (although the diagonal slash on his torso is now running in the opposite directions). Faraday and the Ninja exchange glances of pure hatred, and then Faraday chops the Ninja in the throat, apparently killing him, and walks away immediately. The same recycled footage of him entering the phone room is played for the third time; when he gets to the phone, new footage plays of him inserting the slug and frantically dialing. After a tense 15 seconds of ringing, a voice announces, "If you'd like to make a call, please hang..." Faraday gasps and slams the receiver down, then stares at the coin return with barely-suppressed rage, and after many long seconds and several cuts between the coin return and Faraday's face, the token emerges. He hastily grabs it and inserts it, dialing again. The wait this time is more than twice as long. After 45 seconds of ringing, with the camera cutting between Faraday's sweat-soaked face and the phone, the line is picked up. Before he can say anything, the person who answers speaks. Faraday, horrified beyond sanity, can only listen dumbly at the sound of his own voice on the other end of the line.
"Hello? Faraday speaking! Who is this!!? This is Faraday! Who is this!? Are you there?? How do I get an outside line?! Answer me!!"

Episode 9: "Waiting in the Wings/Bloodborne/A Thousand to One"

"Several characters recall their differing accounts of Faraday's encounter with Mole Men and Hollow Earth Vikings."
After the opening sequence, the episode opens on an extreme close-up of a heavily bearded man angrily shouting, mid-sentence, in a thick and unidentifiable accent. The camera cuts back to reveal that the man is dressed as a viking warrior. He screams, red-faced, that “that blusted Foorerdach is combing vick oss!” The camera reveals that he and several other Vikings are engaged in a standoff of sorts with a number of mole-men, of the type previously seen in episode 5. The mole-men gibber unintelligibly, occasionally emitting piercing shrieks, and gesture wildly with their crude claw-like hands. The vikings all continue shouting at once, brandishing their weapons menacingly. After several minutes of this, the camera swings around to reveal Faraday, strapped to a chair in the center of the room, alternately struggling to free himself and lapsing into a half-conscious daze. One of the vikings waves his axe at the mole-men and exclaims, “Eaah dawrn coire vats ees dwayne, a weearwah zees mugty marst foowat fire owls!” The camera cuts back to Faraday, and a screen effect seems to imply that a flashback is taking place.
In the flashback, Faraday, shirtless, is running through a series of caverns (clearly the same set used in episode 5), with a sword in each hand, screaming. He enters a large chamber, now wearing the shredded remains of a shirt and armed with a sword and shield, and screams again before engaging a number of mole-men in melee combat. He quickly dispatches them, and pauses to catch his breath. Suddenly, the earth shakes violently, and Faraday looks around, bewildered. The camera jump-cuts to Faraday, now wearing crude leather armor and armed with a trident and net, engaged in combat with a giant mole-man-monster. Several minutes of battle follow, and Faraday seems to be winning until the mole-man-monster grabs a discarded spear and stabs Faraday in the abdomen. Faraday, pained, grabs the wound; when he moves his hands to inspect the damage, the hallucinogenic gas pours out and he immediately loses consciousness.
Instead of gas hallucination montage, the opening sequence plays again, though this time several additional scenes featuring the Alligator-Men are added. After the entire sequence finishes, it opens to exactly the same scene the episode began on, with the screaming viking. The scene plays out nearly identically, but when the viking shouts the line that led to the flashback, a mole-man interrupts him with 20 seconds of gibbering, shrieking, and wild gesticulating. The mole-man then points at Faraday, and the flashback screen effect happens again.
In this flashback, Faraday, dressed only in a loincloth, toils in the desert, hauling massive stones. One of the vikings appears to be an overseer, cracking a whip menacingly. Many mole-men toil along with Faraday, moving the huge stone blocks; Faraday appears to be the only human slave. After an extended scene of Faraday struggling to move stones, sweating heavily, with long shots of his straining face, the camera cuts to a viking cruelly whipping a fallen mole-man. The viking laughs to himself as he strikes the mole-man, until a hand catches the viking’s before he can bring the whip down again. The camera pulls back, revealing Faraday, standing defiantly, with the surrounding mole-men cowering in awe of his boldness. Faraday knocks the viking out with one punch, and lifts a previously-unseen spear from the ground, holding it above his head, and rallies the mole-men to him with a shout. He then leads the mole-men in an uprising, swarming over the outnumbered vikings. After a mighty but short-lived battle, the mole-men celebrate. While Faraday sits in repose atop a kingly throne, the mole-men and female mole-men perform their traditional Mole-Man Dance of One Thousand Victories, a lengthy and complex routine that runs for three minutes. After the dance finishes, a mole-man approaches, presenting a female mole-man. Faraday looks her over and says, “your daughter, eh? Old friend, I accept.” He jumps to his feet and takes the female mole-man in a passionate embrace, kissing her. When they separate, the female mole-man kneels, and presents a jewelry box. Faraday reaches behind his throne to produce a parka capsule; as the action theme soars, he dons his parka, and is married to the female mole-man. When he lifts her veil (as she is suddenly wearing a wedding dress), hallucinogenic gas pours out and Faraday loses consciousness yet again.
Once more, the opening sequence plays, further modified with more inserted Alligator-Men. Three quarters of the way through the opening, the camera unexpectedly pulls back, showing that the opening sequence is being projected on a screen. The camera swings around, revealing that Faraday is strapped to a chair facing the screen, with a device on his head holding his eyelids open; his mouth gapes, a look of mostly-absent but inchoate fear on his face. As the camera finishes pulling back, an Alligator-Man is shown to be standing directly behind Faraday, its hands on its hips. It begins laughing in a guttural, menacing tone, and then the hallucinogenic gas pours out of its mouth, filling the room, until the screen fades to black, with only the laughter continuing.

Episode 10: "Taming The Infinite Fire"

The episode opens on Faraday in a small, poorly lit room, blocking the only door with rubble. After testing to make sure the door is barricaded, he produces a small metal case inside of which is a large syringe full of yellow-green liquid, labelled 1000X. Faraday sits on a stone and injects himself in the arm, quickly passing out; through the use of the screen distortion employed when he is gassed, it is implied that this is a concentrated dose of the hallucinogenic drug. While unconscious, he relives a number of scenes from previous episodes, but with the alligator-men now shown as being responsible for the failure of his escape attempts. A scene from Episode 8 is shown: it is revealed that an alligator-man tripped Faraday, leading to the extended chase and eventual loss of the first phone token.
Additionally, he experiences a number of alternate futures. In one, Faraday, in a white three-piece suit, opens a box labelled L.I.N.C.O.L.N., withdraws an injection gun and injects himself in the neck. He then walks over to a raised dais; the camera cuts to a view from above, revealing that the dais is actually a large clock. Faraday checks his watch before disappearing. After a number of such scenes, he awakes in a sunny field of grass. Faraday, confused but seemingly free, wanders through the field, picks an apple from a tree and bites into it, and smiles. Suddenly, he freezes, his eyes locking on something out-of-frame; he sprints into the field, only to come up a previously unseen wall, painted to appear as the sky. Banging on the wall and yelling, Faraday finds a door and opens it, the camera holding on his terrified expression for long seconds before cutting to what he sees: the door opens into a large room typical of the complex, with a very high ceiling. Painted in enormous block letters on the wall facing Faraday are the words: "THERE IS NOTHING ELSE"...

...Episode 14: "Simulacrum"

The episode opens with Faraday exploring the complex. Before long he comes into a new area with a vastly different architectural style than what he's encountered before. Faraday rapidly realizes that he seems to be backstage in a theater, with a performance of Our American Cousin already in progress. He works his way around and ends up in a booth, where a man is sneaking up behind a fellow in a stovepipe hat. Faraday, realizing that he is about to witness the assassination of Abraham Lincoln, grabs who he presumes to be John Wilkes Booth by the shoulder. Booth whirls around and Faraday is horrified to see that it is in fact one of the alligator-men in a suit and wig. Faraday is shocked to his core, as this is the first time he's seen an alligator-man without being gassed. Even in this state, Faraday knows he must protect the president, and violently struggles with alligator-Booth, eventually subduing him. Lincoln thanks Faraday and together they leave the theater, seeking a way to escape. A number of scenes follow, with Lincoln and Faraday fighting jump-suited henchmen, hiding from Red Ninjas, and rearranging vacuum tubes to activate a doorway. Faraday and Lincoln find a door marked 'exit', but before they can reach it, men dressed in traditional Native American outfits attack them. After a brief but intense battle, Faraday and Lincoln are victorious, but Lincoln's hat is knocked off in the scuffle. When he goes to retrieve it, both he and Faraday freeze: there are two identical hats, side by side. The two exchange glances, and Lincoln reaches for the hat on the left. Faraday exclaims, "wait!" but it's too late: as soon as Lincoln touches the hat, the hallucinogenic gas pours out and both men lose consciousness.
The view fades back in from black on Faraday, back at the theater, in Lincoln's seat and wearing Lincoln's clothes. Faraday seems totally oblivious to everything but the play, watching raptly. A number of extremely long, very close shots of Faraday's face follow; in intense inner struggle seems to be happening. The camera cuts to a view behind Faraday, and shows Booth from behind, sneaking up on Faraday with his pistol drawn. As Booth raises his weapon, a shot rings out. Faraday turns suddenly to see Booth, dead and fully human, lying on the ground. He turns back around to see where the shot came from. The camera cuts to show Faraday's view: inexplicably, a tall brick building in front of a blue sky (scholarly sources have noted that the building closely resembles the Texas School Book Depository). The camera zooms in on a figure in a window, which turns out to be Lincoln, in Faraday's Action Parka, wielding a sniper rifle. Lincoln waves at Faraday. The camera cuts back to Faraday, who waves back in a state of confusion. He then turns around, the camera closely focused on his face, as a look of mortal terror consumes him. The camera cuts to show what he's seeing: Booth's body is now his own, lying bloody and dead on the ground."

From http://hatch.kookscience.com/wiki/The_Man_From_Y.E.T.I. ; I got really excited as I read about this show; holy fuck! It's like they put Jeff Rients back in time to save television.

So imagine my disappointment when I realized that this had to be an internet hoax (the "a Deleuzian Randorph-Retsobrenner Synchro-Phasic Fusilizer!" part is what tipped off my fevered sweaty brain). Regardless, the above internet bullshit is genius on so many levels that I think I have to have a Dungeon inspired by THE MAN FROM Y.E.T.I.; it would also make for a great Encounter Critical campaign!

6 comments:

  1. I make my roll to disbelieve in the existence of this show...then I reject reality and choose to live in a world where it did exist.

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  2. I'm eating this stuff up. Reminds me a lot of the faux series description in the Spaceship Zero tpg.

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  3. Now I'm imagining D&D dungeons being run by Alligator Men that use cheap special effects and hallucination to brainwash former Secret Agents into thinking that they're fantasy adventurers on an adventure...

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  4. That reminds me of Yellowjacket Greenapple.

    http://www.somethingawful.com/d/fashion-swat/retro-swat-2.php?page=9

    http://www.somethingawful.com/d/news/yellowjacket-greenapple-pi.php

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  5. Reminds me of Portal, The Man from Uncle, and The Prisoner. All of these things are cool.

    Does all this mean Jeff should be in the TV bizness?

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  6. W. T. F.

    I think I broke some brain cells reading that. These "episodes" remind me of stories my nephew and I would write together; we would each write a short chapter simultaneously. The results were often hilarious, and always made about as much sense when pieced together.

    "Does all this mean Jeff should be in the TV bizness?"

    Bear in mind that this faux-show only had a 17-episode run. Sadly, I think that answers your question. (That's okay - we need him here in the Hobby anyway!)

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